Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Sometimes Things Are More Than Just Black & White....

I heard someplace before that the colors that people are attracted to means different things about their intellect or their personality.

I love the colors yellow and green. On some sites it says that people that gravitate towards those colors are actually very intellectual and for the most part have sparkling personalities. I think that’s true (LOL). It also says that people that are attracted to red and orange tones are fiery (makes sense) passionate people and have very strong feeling ethically. Blue and violet people tend to be our peace lovers and spiritual healers, but have a hell of a time making any kinds of decisions. Finally, white and black (the absence or totality) of all color are reserved for those people that love simplicity and are clear thinkers. Most leaders gravitate towards black and white….coincidentally, so do most babies. Maybe that is because we are as smart as we are ever going to need to be in this life when when are at our most vulnerable age. Interesting.

Two weekends ago, while at the FR Convention in Orlando I had a very healing experience with someone that mirrored one that I had myself many years before. While doing a bit of “room” shopping, I came upon a room that was filled to the rim with some of the most amazing early FR dolls for sale. These would be considered many people’s “grail dolls”. A Brighter Side Kyori, Sound Advice Gift Set, Baroness Agnes….the list went on and on. You would think that this person was just a ball of sunshine with so many treasures in her room, but immediately I noticed a hint of sadness in her demeanor. She was nervous and seemed very uneasy about something. Well, call me “Iyanla”, but I had to know if this lady was ok. So, I began to talk to her and find out a bit more about her convention experience, because for me it is the happiest week of my year (most of the time). She told me that she was very nervous because some individual’s that she had belonged to a “club” with, whom she never thought she would ever run into at a FR Convention were there and she was scared. My heart went out to her. I had a similar situation with a “club” many years before that  spoiled collecting dolls for me for almost 10 years. I immediately went into protective mode. I don’t know whether it is because I’m a Cuban male and I’m very protective of the ladies around me or because I saw my own experience reflected in her teary eyes, but I was ready and willing to come out as her defender and knight in shining armor.

Low and behold, as the story unfolds I come to find out the identity of some of the people that had put this fragile individual in such a state. I knew them. Hell, I considered them all good friends. I was shocked. Dumbfounded and ultimately ashamed that these individuals that I knew to be great people had probably unwittingly made this poor person feel so unwanted in our ranks. Well, I don’t know about all of you – but I like “peace”. I hate for things to be be in “pieces”…so, I did what I do….I set out to fix the situation even if just a little.

Later on that evening I saw one of my friends, whom I knew to be a kind, loving sweet individual and shared the story with him. He was, I could tell, taken aback by the whole story. I asked him to please try to heal this situation with this lady and he was willing. I couldn’t have been prouder of my friend. I brought the two of them together and they began to talk with my as an intermediary, but once the ice was broken I took a step back and let them figure things out for themselves. Ultimately, I don’t know if the whole wound was healed, but I knew that at least conversation has started and that is always the right path towards healing.

Collecting dolls should be about love – pure and simple. The love of dolls, fashion, friends and a return to childhood good times. We as adults that indulge ourselves in nostalgic collectibles for different reason are hopefully passed many of the immaturity that cause us to bully or hurt each other’s feelings when “playing together” with our toys now. I urge you, if you have had a falling out with a friend, loved one or group – broach the subject and start the healing. We are here to learn from each other people and become better spirits in the end. All it takes is one person to start, one person to put out their hand, one person to allow the vulnerability of a child to possess their mind and hearts if even for a moment. Seems pretty “black and white” to me.




  1. Awwwwww, Great job on reconnecting them, and Your absolutely right about that. We should always be positive and inclusive to others.

    btw: i'm love the lil' write up on colors, and i'm attracted to violets & blues (as my costume at the gala made reference) and yea, love being a peacemaker, and horrible at making decisions. I'm always like "you decide"

  2. Thanks for writing about your experience with the nervous person. Its so sad that some doll collectors are mean to other people, and kudos to you for trying to help out! Doll collecting is a hobby that is about joy and fun and the best thing is to keep sharing this message so the people who create drama stop it!

  3. Thanks Everyone! I put myself in the place of that lady and I just knew I had to do something....I knew what it was like to feel attacked by a group of people...and it sucks. To stand by and not do something would of been tantamount to tolerating bullying. I appreciate the support and the kind words written as comments!
    To quote Mary Jane Blige " No More Drama in my life...."and especially in the doll world!